Welcome back to HazzardAyre where the Ayre is fresh

Welcome back to HazzardAyre, where I will endeavor to keep the Ayre fresh.

Seems everyone needs a day or hour off. This is not the case always for us in toewing. For the few brave beings that don the jacket, put up with the racket and engage the cold and snow whether day or the darkness of night we are there.

I saw a diddy that I tried to cut & paste from one of the newsletters, from one of my suppliers in Portland, that told this story very well.

Holidays are no holiday for us in toewing. Even my ToewBro’s will tell you that just because our wives, lady pals and kids have visions of sugar plums in their heads we who are on call every hour all year long are not in our beds.

We are watching the old Christmas movies with boots on, scanner blaring, two way ready, cell phone charged, and truck all warmed up for that just in case call.

Of course , its Christmas day, the ham and sweet taters all yummy , cold buttermilk, deep fried okra, with chitlans ready for popping , the inevitable call of somebody on the super road in the ditch, needing hooked. So Christmas dinner is more like what can be put in the fridge and nuked when you get back. That’s if you get to stay home once one gets back home long enuff to eat it. The many pies and all that I have had to eat medium warm, to really cold, I can’t count.

So why do we do it? More over how do you keep from burning out ?

For me the toewing profession was a calling, not a 1st choice. Up to mid 1974 all I wanted to do was fly and be a helo cop. That is be a police officer that did patrol from the air, something I saw in an old TV show called 240 Robert. Try finding that one on DVD. Any mile, prior to that it was being a radio star.

Then came that hour in 1975 when I needed to go somewhere, my cuzzin Judy’s friend Steve who started and owned Steve’s Towing of Ogden Utah, said to me if you need that truck moved, move it yourself.

I got in that old Dodge, and while it may have been only a few minutes , it seemed a life time. A quiet calm came over me in that truck, the clouds opened and what sounded like trumpets and I knew right then running a tow truck was my destined profession. 3 years later after working for two companies Johnny’s Towing and Valley Towing of Twin Falls Idaho, at the last is when one morning at a old cafe, she sat all beautiful, her pipes breathing vapor, marker lights illuminating the quiet early morning darkness was LexiBelle. My boss, Dave told me at the shop, he was selling her. Well in April 1978 on my birthday, and $8,000.00 later, LexiBelle came home with me. That was 1,600,000 miles ago, as it reads on her odometer and, I have went through 9 other support rides since, but LexiBelle, albeit a gas guzzler which is why I drive support trucks, still LexiBelle, will fire everytime I need her to. Has not lost off the back one towed vehicle, no damage reports, and no accidents.

Thankfully through the Hazzard County Knytes, that I am able to do the radio star gig and still toew.

Okay then, I gave the docu of giving credit where credit is due. So to one of and the Utah Charter President of the Knytes of Anarchy(aka-Hazzard County Knytes) Tommy Pistone , was the one that renamed the Hazzard County Garage in Utah.

See we was on the way back from a tow in this 82 white Chevy tow truck, that I wanted in the worst way, as it was the last tow truck with a Holmes 1200 hydraulic on the back. The two way in it was old, and every time you wanted to use it, ya’ll had to slam the main box against the back wall of the truck. Any whoo Tommy and I was on my way back, and saw a ride that I thought would be ripe for a redoux, Tommy said , “ Pat you don’t customize, you Cooter-ize it.” So at that hour Cooter’s Kustmz was born and the slogan , at Cooter’s Kustmz its not customized , it’s Cooter-ized, and that has remained ever since.

Now finally b4 I go as my fingers are cramping, for the mentally deficient or mentally absent, the addy to get in touch with me and the Hazzard-Knytes is 811 21st street Heyburn Idaho 83336, look at the ad below and ya’ll figure it out. Now b4 my arthritis really kicks in, have a Hazzard County Christmas.

L8R Ya’ll

Quote of the day:
We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over. - Aneurin Bevan

Isaiah 7:14“Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.” Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.

Ah the smells of Pheromones HazzardAyre Introducing Hellbilly Trucker Mag

Ah the smells of Pheromones, or at least the opposite gender. While toes in hose might not be the center of attention by most of the male corpuscles reading this.. The fact is the other port, has erry effects on both genders. Its been proven that the smell of a female’s ah place, will attract other females. Ain’t quite got it figured, might be that other females get wet or attracted to a guy with that smell because its the feline thing. Just like kitty cats two cats will always go after the same bowl, even if both cats are served the same thing in two different bowls. Never fails. That said, certain smells will draw the male just like it does in the wyld. Both get that scent, and loose all common sense. As if they had any sense, wouldn’t go there to begin with.

Got a get together with our Nurse GoodBody on the 13th , if she’d wear her toes in hose and I got a whiff, that’d make my holidays. Although getting either SOA, or the collectors set of Airwolf on dvd would do it too. Let ya’ll know.

Okay b4 I head to bed.

The local charter of KOA aka Hazzard-County Knytes, decided to create a spin off of HazzardAyre here, that is on the same highway and nearly the same flavor as Rebel Rodz/EasyRider or Ole Skool Rodz. Only in this case, our publication goes to that of otr(Over the Road) Long haul trucks and yes toew trucks that favor or sport the rat rod look. Rat rods for those uneducated here are home built customs that do not have a bunch of chrome or fancy paint, but run better than those with a bunch of sparkling eye candy.

Put a few hot bods(gals) with some rather flat painted custom trucks, talk about things that go beyond trucker or trucking news, but are of interest to the OTR owner/driver, and give it one heck of a handle to light the handle.

We will call it: HellBilly Trucker Mag, short for HellBilly Trucker Magazine. In essence a Rockabilly trucker publication.

Until Thursday,

   

Quote of the day:
Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it. - Tallulah Bankhead

John 14:6“Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.

Cable TV is predictable HazzardAyre

So woke up yesterday to the sounds of my cell phone ringing , it was Rickey, went to Pocky, dropped off the Cat loader, headed home.

Got home in time for to meet the cable installer, got cable, finally got Internet, all good.

Not being able to sleep turned on USA, watched the Dukes movie, which ran last year at about the same time, on the same network. Amazing. If ya’ll loose the cable, for a few months except for the plug on your email, making your inbox as full as a stopped up toilet, ya’ll will see the same thing on TV, the same place, and at the same time, usually.

The only thing I am tweaked about is, didn’t get to see all of SOA this year, but will surly buy the season when it rolls out on DVD come spring.

With any luck, we’ll have another season of SOA on come next September.

With it all however my body is spent, need sleep.

In my next entry to get your crotch wet, will tell you why ads were not placed, (YET) with both the Weekly Reader and, The Voice here in the Mini Cassia area. Second , why things look good for KOA here, and third, details of our ads on FoX .

L8R Ya’ll

 

Quote of the day:
We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over. - Aneurin Bevan

John 14:6“Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.

Back on the Cyber Highway, Here’s HazzardAyre Coming at ya’ll

After 5 months, back online, cable in ready to truck these cyber highways.

It’s been interesting to live without for as long as I have, but hey, this connection they cain’t unplug as I own it. That is for $80.00 a month.

The local elections are over, few of our UCSP candidates won but two did, one in Wendover Utah and one in Arizona. Guess one needs to distance ones self from LDS influence to get Confederate mind sets to get to thinking.

Our radio station is on , just waiting for the change of ownership, paperwork to get done, then KBAR in Burley, becomes KDXB. and so it goes.

As far as HazzardAyre TV? Nope, cain’t. The FCC with the need to relandscape the bands of TV especially Ch-51 has put a moratorium on new and pending FCC new station apps. So we is on the wait button, but at the top of it , none the less.

Been trailer truckin with Rick for the last 5 months, running equipment east and northeast for Cat , for rentals , so not bad. Hey its us just under a smoke front.

Finally , starting the long tedious efforts to find Miss Hazzard-County for 2012. It’ll be a busy year. Have ads poised for FoX for the 500, and some newscasts.

Sure miss our Nurse GoodBody, to give you an idea here, look at these pics;

 This is our Nurse GoodBody,

This is the original, Nurse GoodBody , portrayed on the old rural variety show Hee-Haw .

I sure miss ours.

I have more to get into here, but will wait till menyanna.

Need feed and sleep.

L8R Ya’ll

Quote of the day:
Rage is the only quality which has kept me, or anybody I have ever studied, writing columns for newspapers. - Jimmy Breslin

John 11:25“Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die;” Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.

Confederate Thinking

There is that hour when your trucking along, tunes on the juke box radio, and you get to thinking. For some its a normal, path, for those of us from Hazzard County, its called Confederate Thinking.

Like going into vote. You ask the question, how come the Confederate Party is not on the ballot? Answers go from , nobody is running on that party, or two, I dunno. Question is why not?

In 2012 the election cycle for not only minor local races going to be decided, but national ones as well.

From President to many others, if your not voting don’t bitch. Likewise we in the UCSP , that is United Confederate States Party in case you didn’t know, likewise for those in Rio Vista, California that are near brain dead anyway.

I read in Penthouse, something really good to read by the way, not just lusting over the pictorials of women I can’t have anyway. But read there that it was the damn Cali gold rush that helped finance the great battle tween the states(Civil-War) damn Yankees. I knew I hated California and the HollyWierd for a reason.

Getting back on course the UCSP needs to get up to speed and start getting recognized. Its going to be tuff about as hard as getting the Roman’s to recognize the Gentiles. But we can get it done. It must be done to get folks in office that have a heart, as well as a brain.

Here’s an example of bullshit from local government.

Had the situation of the condition of getting utilities up and going for the Reaper’s Quarters(Wolf’s Lair) here in Heyburn , okay they required $200.00 for a deposit. $200.00 ? That’s ridqulus , especially when I already had service with the same utility in 2007, which showed on the books, as good, even when I left for Pocatello, it showed that they had refunded the deposit. Yet due , so they gave me a couple of weeks free. Good so far, but then of course Cuzzin Bud goes down with a Pulmonary Embolism due to some serious complications with his diabetes. Meaning getting money out of the SAMCRO till was like pulling teeth. Finally with 2nd Cuzzin Shar’s help got the money, but hey, Heyburn can’t process credit cards. So I had to wait for the Pony Express snail mail. Thought it’d be here Monday, wasn’t , got here Tuesday. But it meant , I had to sleep in the cold, no ability to use water and/or fix grub, as Monday they had to cut the juice, at 16:00 hours Monday. They just could not wait 12 damn hours.

I understand they must have a bunch of delinquent accounts and all, but from someone they already knew, understanding that Cuzzin Bud is 80 plus years old, flat on his back in a hospital, trying to get things done through my 2nd Cuzzin , who has 5 kids to care for, and they couldn’t wait 12 hours? There needs to be a change, and the UCSP is that change.

In the modern computerized got to have it now generation we live in today, regulations are one thing, but there needs to be the human factor implemented as well.

The UCSP is that Human Factor.

Until Next Time;

L8R Ya’ll

 

Quote of the day:
Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. - Bill Vaughan

HazzardAyre Radio is progressing

Ah that first byte of Skoal after a long dryspell. Things you normally take for granted or always there, when they ain’t, Ya’ll appreciate them more. No I was not in a captive state er anything, but conditions were that my good ole pal Nate and I went over yonder the other side of CokeVille Wyoming to get some fyre wood and his phantasmagorical FORD F500 puked. We wuzz stuck for a few days, eating beanie weenies out of a can, having to stay warm with a camp stove and watching DVD’s on his in truck entertainment system, that is, until his Diehard battery really died hard. Come Monday here come a few buds got the truck running after priming each hole with fuel, guess self priming ain’t so much.

Once back here to Lala land had Thanksgiving dinner at Charlie's Cafe in Burley where I have developed a crush over some Mexicali Annette Funicello lookalike. Kind of mysterious about giving out her name, but hey its early in this race.

Found out both Chevy(GM) and Ford, will no longer offer standard trannies in 2012. Thats right if your a clutch fan, don’t expect to option out on a rig with a clutch. Cuzz outside of RAM (Dodge) nobody else offers the critters.

Okay then, HazzardAyre Radio is progressing towards reignition. I expect somewhere April or May 2012. Most of the old radio studio gear has been recovered, we now have a place to put up a firestick, so get ready to twist your dial to 101.1 here, in the Mini Cassia area of Idaho , for 24/7/365 rebel , confederate radio. Including HazzardAyre Radio.

I wanted to enlighten the parties that be, when it gets to the tarmac of going on the hunt for babes 4 pay for feature shoots for both HazzardAyre News, as well as our latest inclination called HellBilly Trucker Magazine, I do not do such to get laid. I’m not saying I’d turn it down, but that’s not the intent. First the rule applies, that you never put your pen in hired or company ink. That just invites problems .

If all I wanted to do was to snuggle with hosed toes and get hot tween the sheets, a few hundred bucks and a short haul in one of my trucks takes care of that.

The fact is, and I still believe, that there are hot bods around Idaho, that can be feature talent for our publications and such.

Any mile, time for rest, whiskey , and a warm bath.

Catch ya’ll on the flip side,

Quote of the day:
Never give a party if you will be the most interesting person there. - Mickey Friedman

 

Rat Rod Ayre? HazzardAyre 4 December 2011

B4 I get into my rants here I want to ask, who is it that comes up with the names for fonts? Like this one, is called Playbill. Playbill? Glad it ain’t separated since if it was and Bill was capitalized it’d have a heap of a lot of difference , kinda like being an Athletic Supporter or and athletic supporter.

Next , I was ashamed at the Pisano publishing folks, who do up such notable enthusiasts magazines as EasyRiders and now Rebel Rodz. Their November issue had the doggiest looking gal on there in Mexican garb that I have ever seen. If it’d been me, and I had my choice, I’d have went to print without a cover model, b4 I put her on there. Plus any other publishing company I’d excuse, but the one we all adore that rolls out the babes in EasyRiders, putting that on there? Whew needs work friends.

Course it’d be kinda hard to beat Stephanie one of their feature models from 2009 in EasyRiders. Which we here at AyreWolf Aviation/Cooter’s Rat Shak, are trying to get for a few ads in Rebel Rodz. Which brings me to my subject here.

The Rat Rod movement is really gaining momentum , there are a half dozen magazine titles out there on your news-stands about the hobby, one we here at HazzardAyre released in September, HellBilly Trucker featuring OTR rigs done in Rat Rod fashion.

But I’d like to take this further, what about rat rod style aircraft? How about , a rat rod style warbird? Granted , warbirds weren’t all that flashy to begin with, many do have the flat paint jobs, and outside of the ladies on the nose art, most were not that sporty. But what about X-byrds , 1/2 the size of a combat warbyrd, but just as deadly, and done as I said , in rat rod style? Can you say it again? Rat Rod Aircraft.

As I close, again , I’d like to say to Rebel Rodz and EasyRiders, give your Rebel Rodz November 2011 feature model a make over and try it again, maybe even feature that sweet Stephanie from EasyRiders 2009 in there in a rat rod truck?

L8R Aviators

Quote of the day:
It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated. - Alec Bourne

John 11:25“Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die;” Brought to you by BibleGateway.com. Copyright (C) . All Rights Reserved.