When I was young, never needed help from anyone, as the song went, I too thought I’d never be at this mile marker. Heck I thought I’d be dust in the wind by now, or at least age 40 or 45. Here I am age 54. Went to the Doctor, yesterday, got prescriptions up the whazoo, then went over to check on a new bike. But sadly my body has grown horizontal not vertical so my short legs can’t straddle the bike like I would need to at a stop light, so need to conjure up a Trike. Only one problem, Doctor says I have to stay away from Argon Gas, in essence can’t weld, so going to have help. I could build most of the Trike, but will need help from club members on their days off. Same thing in the air shop. About the only thing I still can do is toew. Problem is where I’m at, you have to have some sort of side business, beit a gas station, body shop, scrap yard whatever a toewing service by itself here will not survive very well. Especially when I have competitors like my friend Charles and Jared over at A1, they have show trucks with chrome so clean ya’ll could eat off it. Mine, while I kiss her daily, to be able to run and make a dollar, I need to be in say Bliss, American Falls, Rockford, etc in essence where the closest toew truck is more than a half hour away. Then I could make a few extra bucks. That’s why I focus on this radio station gig. I may not be the grandest rockin bike builder like I used to be, and not tearing up the road going toewing, but I can be the voice on the radio for those that are, especially the club I helped to create in 1980.
Then there is those repair and installation guys. They think, that before noon, is great. Me I fight all night for breath, I’ll even soon have to have an oxygen machine here. I get migraine headaches like you can’t believe meaning no bright light, so I work at night. Which means waking me before 15:00(3:00PM) is way out of line.
SpeedConnect did that again today. Again what the hell are they going to do? Erect a pole outside the Lair, that’s all that’s left. They’ve done everything else. Why wake me?
Of course now I have to wake up at least 4 times a day, to poke my finger to check blood sugar. Forget me ever returning to a 70 or below reading, I hover around the 145 to 170 mark, sometimes over, sometimes slightly below, but high anyway. Sure there are meds to help. One makes my pecker shrink to a point, I think little Herman is going backwards, the other gives me sweats, But I take them and what I call my Easter basket assortment of meds. But at least I can still climb inside your radio in front of this console and play the history of southern rock, and twangy kountry all night and give you the rebel wolf howl, and keep all the truckers, company in that truck, talk about the days of old going toewing and so on, and do what I can to keep the legends of our southern culture as well as the legacies of airpower alive, for all to remember and honor.
Sadly though I’m smart enough to know, I’m slowly loosing this race of life. I have at best 25 maybe 30 years left of that maybe 20 productive years. And for once in my life, I’m scared. Scared of loosing my life alone. I surly thought by now I’d have gained a great gal to be with me as mom was for Dad, but sadly every gal and good gal I know of is hooked up with someone else. Few females come over without it being a job interview or business related. I fear the most, that one night, I’m going to finally go off the air, climb in bed, and the only way that anybody would know I’m gone, is that I’m not on radio, or the smell of the Lair as my body rots. Sure my PSR shows up, but this new one, has no idea who to call, to let albeit distant, my family know I croaked. Sure the club sort of keeps tabs, but by the time they all found out I’d be pealing skin. One of the reasons I hooked back up with Charles and Ricky at A1, especially Ricky, is that Rickey knows my family enough to know who to call. He knows that Kathy at 1000 springs resort is my cousin so he’d call there. As well as the rest of the club. But Charles has Rickey going so much I haven’t seen Rickey hardly at all over the last 5 months.
But I am feeling very much older, alone and scared.
More L8R
Quote of the Day:
Keep your fears to yourself, but share your inspiration with others.
--Robert Louis Stevenson
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